What Do You Mean, "Cry It Out"?!
Does your body tighten up a little bit when you hear the term "Cry it out?" Honestly, mine does too. Why? Because there are SO many misconceptions around this entire idea that I hope to put to rest in this post.
One of the most common questions I get asked is "Is your method a CIO method?" which is probably the most loaded question out there, so let me break it down for you.
First, let's define what this means. The term "Cry It Out" is often misunderstood as putting your baby in a room and letting them cry for hours and hours until they finally wear themselves out enough to fall asleep. And with that misconception, OF COURSE people are terrified and turned off from the idea of sleep training. That sounds terrible! And I would never recommend that.
To me, "Cry It Out" has so many meanings, which is why with my method I prefer to use a "modified cry it out," because it is a very slow, steady and gentle form of crying—which is only ever used if absolutely necessary.
Second, let's talk about when and how it's used. The idea with my method is that if you start from the beginning (4 weeks) like I recommend, then there is often no crying involved at all. (*See my Newborn Mini-Course HERE!)
However, if you have a 9 month old that has been breastfeeding around the clock since birth, of course there will be some protesting on their part simply because they are learning something new and different. Just like you get frustrated trying to learn a new skill at first, babies can get frustrated learning this skill as well! That doesn't mean they are being damaged in any way shape or form, just like your life or mental health isn't ruined by feeling some frustration for a few minutes until you get the hang of something new.
My sleep training program consists of 5 parts: day sleep, night sleep, wake windows, feedings, and environment. All of these parts must work together in order to teach your baby the skill of sleep. IF there is crying involved, it is simply a brief period of giving your baby some space to learn.
So to answer the above question, NO, I do not say that my method is a "Cry It Out" method, simply because there's SO much more that goes into sleep training than that. Sure, there might be small moments of crying in the process, but that is not the focus of my method. The goal is to have a safe, gentle, loving and positive sleep training experience for everyone involved.
If you want to hear me dive into this topic in detail, check out THIS podcast episode on The Sleep Fairy Way Podcast to learn more.